Everyone else: ACCHAN'S LEAVING?!! Miichan: Yessssss more screentime for me.
It was the announcement no one ever wanted to happen, but would someday be inevitable.
Though I doubt anyone ever expected it to come this soon.
Atsuko Maeda, a founding member of AKB48 and one of the most visible celebrities in Japan, has announced that she will be graduating from the group.
Well, do they?
It isn’t enough that they already fill my waking hours and account for most of my major purchases. Apparently they have entered my subconscious, as well.
I’m not a very good dreamer. I usually only get 5-6 hours of sleep on weeknights, and I have an alarm to ruin my waking mornings, so I forget my dreams right away because my brain doesn’t get enough rest and processing time to retain them. On weekends, though, I sleep in like crazy, leading to all sorts of fantastical images running through my head that linger well into mid-morning. By the time I pull my ass out of bed, sometime between 10 a.m. and noon, I jog my mind a little bit, recall the messages that my subconscious transmitted to me, and ask myself: “What the hell just happened?”
AKB48 has taken over my waking AND my sleeping.
AKB48 has reached a stage of cultural saturation where they could air a 30-minute show called “Atsuko Maeda Farts,” and people would still tune in to watch it meticulously because you never know if Acchan’s fart this week will be different from Acchan’s fart last week. So I really don’t know what to say about The Democratic People’s Republic of United Socialist States of Akihabara Ariyoshi AKB Republic, which basically is
(1) That one dude who sometimes appears on that other AKB show gets to poke more fun at the girls. (Don’t we already get enough of this on every idol variety show? How many more unsuspecting teen-to-twentyish Japanese girls must suffer the slings and arrows of smartass male hosts until there is JUSTICE?)
(2) Kenkyuusei (research students / trainees / understudies / whatever you call ‘em).
lololololol what is this.
Y HALO THAR HARUNYAN.
Where were you when you first saw an AKB member in a bikini?
Were you browsing through the men’s manga magazines, only to find Mai Oshima or Nozomi Kawasaki staring back at you?
Were you trawling for the latest entertainment news and gossip, when suddenly you found yourself face-to-face with a very underdressed Atsuko Maeda?
Or were you, (like me), visiting your usual uploader sites when LO AND BEHOLD IT’S HARUNA KOJIMA IN A BIKINI DEAR LORD MY PRAYERS HAVE BEEN ANSWERED?
Ever since the beginning of mass media and pop culture, there has been an inextricable link between female celebrities and swimsuits. If there is a beautiful woman, there will be horny fans who wish to feast on her with their eyes, and the best way to present that feast without turning to straight-out pr0n is by means of the swimsuit. And so it goes with AKB48, whose booming popularity over the past year has made them a common fixture in cheesecake magazines all across Japan.
But so many of us are busy drooling over their gorgeously photoshopped abs and deliciously creamy thighs that we have overlooked a minor fashion revolution taking place. At some point, AKB48′s swimsuits stopped being swimsuits. They weren’t exactly what you would call lingerie, either, since lingerie was something that slutty gravure idols like Aki Hoshino and Mikie Hara did, but surely not our innocent singing and dancing schoolgirls! Instead, AKB48 has entered an entirely new realm of celebrating the sensuality of the female form. Too impractical to be swimwear or underwear, but still intensely revealing and alluring to the eye, AKB48′s wardrobe choices have entered the realm of … post-gravure.
2009 was the year that was … in photobooks. It was a year that saw the Face of AKB get her first, while the Miracle of Momusu got her last, with a whole lot of bikini surprises in between. These are the ten that made their mark.
1. Koharu Kusumi – Sugar Doll
I will say this: If Koharu hadn’t graduated this year, this probably would have ranked second. But placed in the context of current events, this photobook (and accompanying DVD) elevates itself to the level of an era-defining masterpiece—not merely Koharu’s best, but one of Hello! Project’s best. It is an unforgettable farewell performance, a glossy hardcover memento of everything Koharu is and was to Morning Musume. We watched her grow from a gawky prepubescent girl to a stunning young woman, and she left us with a parting gift that fans will treasure (and fap to) forever.
